When the world comes down
by The Crack Fairy
Summary: Hidan never would have skipped English class if he had known that it would get him the attention of a secret terrorist organisation. Akatsuki AU. Rating might change.
1. 00 Prologue

**Please read this before reading the story**

In this story, the characters will all be coming from different countries in our world. I have only been to two of the countries I chose for them; therefore I am largely working on stereotypes. Also, since they all come from different countries, of course they will be prejudiced towards each other. If country stereotypes offend you, you shouldn't read this.

Disclaimer: I do not own any of the characters. The title is taken from a song by the All-American Rejects.

**You can sit beside me when the world comes down**

-- Prologue --

English was a useless class. Why the hell did he need to learn another language? He lived in Germany, he spoke German, wasn't that good enough? He didn't plan to ever go to the USA or England or wherever else they spoke English.

Hidan thought that was a very good argument for skipping class.

He grabbed his backpack and climbed out of the window right after his math teacher left, immediately making a dash for the gates so no-one would see him.

It was actually quite a nice day; the May sun was shining and there was a cool breeze, making the weather perfect for relaxing. Maybe Hidan would just chill in the city rather than go home – it wasn't like he ever did his homework, anyway.

He took the next bus to the station, not at all concerned with getting caught.

Bus rides were something Hidan really hated. There were three types of people who sat next to you, no exception.

Exhibit A: the obnoxious fourteen year old cunts with the overstyled hair, way too much make up and a fake tan who basically had their cellphones taped to their ear, speaking in either an annoying accent or Arabic. They were also recognizable from a long distance because of their loud high-pitched voice and the smell of cheap perfume. Rude bitches.

Exhibit B: the wreck. Reeked of alcohol and never shut up. They would stagger into the bus, sit down next to you, let out a large burp and then start talking about things that you don't give a flying fuck about.

Exhibit C: the mother with her child. Oh God, how Hidan despised them. The kids smelled and were loud and never fucking sat still and the mothers never did anything to stop them! It was especially awful when the bus was so crowded that no-one fit in anymore, and those stupid bitches with their strollers decided they must try to squeeze in somehow.

Hidan wished they'd all get blown into bits and pieces.

And it wasn't like the train was any different; he had just escaped an old coot on the bus and on the train, one of those obnoxious foreigners stood next to him.

He had long blond hair, which Hidan found rather unusual, and wore it in a ponytail. One of his blue eyes was covered by his bangs. He grinned at Hidan, and Hidan really wanted nothing more than jump out the door and escape.

"Hi," the blond started, and then looked down at a little book in his hands. He sounded a little uncertain. "Eek been zoom ersteyn mall in Doitshland." ["Ich bin zum ersten mal in Deutschland" – "It's my first time in Germany" with an American accent]

Hidan stared at him for quite a few moments before he comprehended what the blond was trying to say. He narrowed his eyes and decided to use the only vocabulary he knew in English – because that guy was obviously English. "_Fuck you._"

The blond still grinned. "_Oh, you speak English, yeah! I'm from America! Do you know where this train is headed, yeah?"_

Hidan reconsidered his thoughts; this guy couldn't be English, he must have been American – he recognized that chewed-up way of speaking from songs; Americans always sounded like they were chewing something. Maybe a cheeseburger. Or five. That'd fit those McDonalds-inventing bastards. "Äh… _I don't… speaks English goodly…" _

"_Oh, I see_!" The blond consulted his book again before patting the train's wall. "Wo-heen?" ["Wohin" – "Where to"]

Hidan tried not to think about how stupid this way of communication was. "Köln… _station_?"

The train came to a stop at the next station – three before Hidan would get off – and the American placed his hand on the German teen's shoulder, beaming. "_Thanks for the help, dude!"_

Hidan furrowed his eyebrows, watching the American get out of the train, almost lost in the crowd of people entering if it wasn't for his bright blond hair. He tilted his head back and their gazes locked for one intense moment, and Hidan swore the blond was smirking.

The doors closed.

Hidan let out a sigh – whether it was in annoyance or relief, he didn't know. He tried to shift so people would stop bumping into him and promptly, his foot connected with something semi-soft.

He glared down, a little puzzled.

A chunk of clay…?

He shrugged and started pushing in between people to find a place to sit somewhere.

--

Deidara watched the train leave the station, shielding his eyes from the sun with one hand. He chuckled and tilted his head, mentally counting to ten before closing his yes. "_Explode_."

--

„_This is John Smith reporting for CNN live from Brühl, Germany, where a train exploded around noon today. The bodies of 39 passengers have been found so far, there have yet to be any survivors, and it is unclear exactly how many people were on the train at that moment. A lot of children and teenagers are amongst the victims, they were on their way home from school when –" _

"_Mince alors_," Sasori cursed, turning down the volume. "_Deidara, tu es vraiment taré_…" [God damnit, Deidara, you are seriously crazy]

"I heard my name, yeah! I knew ya'd miss me, Sasori!"

The redhead glared at the window, where Deidara was currently climbing inside. "What were you thinking, Deidara?! _Des enfants_! You were supposed to target a train during rush hour, with _les adultes, pas des_ children!"

Deidara rolled his eyes. "Oh come on, yeah? The boss didn't specify and I did it whenever, yeah. Now stop complaining, you know I can't take you seriously when your accent comes out so strongly, hm."

Sasori's glare darkened. "_Va te faire foutre, fils de pute_!" [„Fuck off/kiss my ass, son of a bitch!"]

„I mean, I don't get why you're so pissed." Deidara pretended to think. "Hmm… is it because I just proved my art's effectiveness, yeah? A few lumps of clay scattered over the train, and bam, everybody inside is dead. Art is a bang, yeah!"

"_Oh-oh! This is John Smith reporting, and they just found a survivor! They won't let us go any nearer, but from the size, it could be a teenager – h-he's unconscious, but alive! There's a survivor!" _

Sasori smirked, taking a sip of wine and completely enjoying Deidara's devastated face. "Seems like your err… what you call 'art' is not as good as you say."

"What?! That's not fair, hm!" Deidara pointed accusingly at the TV. "I left one in every wagon! There can't be any survivors, they're lying, yeah!"

Sasori let the taste of the wine (and of sweet satisfaction) linger on his tongue, making an appreciative noise and ignoring Deidara. "I sink we will 'ave snails for dinner tonight… And per'aps mousse au chocolat or crème brulée for dessert. I feel in a festive mood suddenly."

"Don't ignore me! I'm telling you, there's something up with that kid, yeah, he can't be alive! Master Sa – Master Sa-soooo-reeeeee!"

-- /Prologue --

Next chapter title: "**A Midnight Visitor**".

Please let me know what you think, and I wish everyone happy holidays, whichever you happen to celebrate!


	2. 01

Disclaimer: I don't own jackshit.

**You can sit beside me when the world comes down**

-- Chapter 01 – A Midnight Visitor --

_Köln, Germany, May 28__th__ 2009, 23:54 o'clock_

Deidara hated hospitals, but he knew that he needed to fix his mistake, and blowing the entire building up was a no-go because he was not allowed to attract any attention.

So he sneaked into the survivor's room.

There were a lot of machines there, blinking and beeping, making Deidara shift uncomfortably. He walked closer to the bed to see the boy better.

He almost did a double take.

There were a lot of bandages, a lot of stitches and burns, wires were connected to his skin in various ways, he wore a respiratory mask and they had cut his hair – but it was definitely that German teen he had talked to on the train.

What were the chances? Out of over a hundred people on the train, the only one he had talked to survived?

Well. Halfway. He was kept alive by machines.

Ah, well. At least that made it easier for Deidara to kill him without much of a fuss. Just pull the plug – that was all he needed to do.

Deidara studied the teen's face, his own expression sinking slightly. It was weird to see his own victims; usually they were dead, and he had no problem with corpses, but to see that kid who had gone through more surgeries in the past week than most people did in their entire life, he felt kind of…

Ah. He should just put the poor bastard out of his misery.

Deidara took a deep breath before scouting for an electric socket. Upon finding one, he reached into his belt pouch, getting a piece of clay and ripping off a tiny bit. He quickly formed it into a small ball and carefully stuffed it into one of the small holes. He concentrated hard, focusing all his energy before mumbling "Explode".

The lights in the room went out. The beeping and blinking stopped.

Deidara felt like he should say something deep – an apology, or a wise line – but he remained firmly silent as he climbed out the window.

--

_Paris, France, May 29__th__ 2009, 08:03 o'clock_

Deidara arrived in Paris the next morning. He hadn't slept a single minute on his way there – he had taken the train to Montparnasse and then a taxi to Sasori's street, and while the train had been comfortable enough, Deidara didn't want to sleep.

He avoided the paper stands at the station like a plague.

"You're late," Sasori commented when he heard the door being unlocked and sipped on his cup.

"Yeah, whatever," Deidara muttered, slipping off his shoes before proceeding into the kitchen to sit opposite of Sasori. The coffee was lukewarm and bitter.

"'Ow did last night go, Deidara? Croissant?"

"Thanks, not hungry." Deidara watched gloomily as Sasori spooned a little jam onto his croissant. "And I got it right this time, no worries, yeah. Cut off the electricity in his room so the machines keeping him alive didn't work anymore."

"_Vraiment_?" [Really?] Sasori raised an eyebrow before reaching to the ground, grabbing a previously discarded newspaper and waved it in the American's face. "So explain this!"

Deidara swallowed, taking the newspaper from the Frenchman and reading out the title story. "Survivor of the Brühl train wreck survives yet again – after a mysterious blackout cut off the machines keeping him alive, he miraculously started breathing on his own again. He has been in a coma for a week and healing is incredibly fast, the doctors say, specialists from all over the world… What the hell?!" Deidara threw the newspaper onto the floor. "I can't believe this, yeah! He wasn't breathing when I left that damn room!"

"Monsieur Leader called me this morning." Sasori took another sip of coffee. "Don't ask me 'ow, but 'e already knew of it. Probably Itachi; that kid can 'ack into anything. 'E suspects that this boy 'as a secret ability, like you and me. 'E already sent someone to investigate."

"Oh fuck this!" Deidara promptly got up, fuming, and stormed towards the bedroom. "I'm gonna sleep, yeah!"

Sasori stared after him before it dawned on him that Deidara had just successfully taken over the only bed in Sasori's small but luxurious apartment. "_Mioche_. _Ces Americains, il a un sacré culot._"[Brat. These Americans, he's incredibly brash.]

--

_Köln, Germany, June 2__nd__ 2009, 19:01 o'clock_

"- It's incredible how fast he's healing! I mean, h-have you seen the medical reports? All these injuries a-and it's a miracle he lived at all, and now he's healing s-so fast!" The doctor with the graying uncombed hair wiped his forehead with a tissue. "What did you say again your name was?"

"Bärtschi." The blue-haired woman gracefully adjusted the glasses in front of her amber eyes. "Greta Bärtschi, a specialist from Switzerland."

"Ah, yes, Mrs Bärtschi!" The old man stopped when they reached a room in front of which another woman was standing, looking uncertain.

Konan studied the other woman briefly; she was pretty for her age, probably in her late thirties, with long silver hair and purple eyes.

"Mrs Vogel, hello," the old man greeted the woman. "Here to see your son again?"

The silver-haired woman nodded sadly. "He… he hasn't woken up yet, has he?"

"You can come inside with me," Konan offered. "I would like to talk to you about your son's medical history anyway."

"Oh, um…" The two women went inside, and the first thing the silver-haired woman did was kiss her son's forehead. "My name is Leonie Vogel." She sat on a chair beside the occupied bed. "This is my son, Hidan. He's… he just turned 18 in April…"

Konan softened slightly. "Greta Bärtschi, a specialist from Switzerland. Is it okay for you if I ask you a couple of questions?" She pulled out a small leather-bound notebook when Mrs Vogel nodded. "Has your son ever had any severe illnesses?"

"He has never been ill a day in his life. Even when the measles broke out in his Kindergarten, he didn't get them." She smiled softly. "He was angry about never getting ill because it meant he never had a reason to stay at home."

"What about injuries?"

"Oh, he was such a reckless child. Still is." Mrs Vogel sighed. "He has had a lot of bruises, sprains and broken bones, but they always healed very fast once the treatment started. And when I say fast, I mean that he broke his arm on a Monday, I took him to the hospital the same day, and two days later, his arm was fine."

Konan reached for the medical report at the front of Hidan's bed and gave it a quick scan over. "He suffered mainly primary blast injuries, his lungs and abdomen took the most damage. His lungs have already healed enough to work on their own again… it's amazing, really." She glanced at Mrs Vogel, who was gently touching her son's face in an affectionate way. "Aren't you scared?"

"God is watching over my son." She smiled softly at the Swiss woman. "He won't let my precious boy die. He has always protected Hidan, so I'm not scared."

"God…" Konan closed her notebook. "Hidan is missing a lot of classes now, isn't he? And then rehabilitation…"

Mrs Vogel sighed softly. "He'll have to repeat grade 12 when he gets out of hospital. I just hope he'll try a little harder then. He's not a stupid boy, I mean, he made it almost to his Abitur, but he doesn't like to work for school, and he likes skipping just a bit too much."

"Do his friends visit him here a lot?"

"They're not allowed to. The head physician only allows immediate family and doctors inside." She sighed again. "But his girlfriend calls to ask about him every day. Such a sweet girl – to think he was going to break up with her before this happened…"

"I have to go, but I would like to ask one more question." Konan turned to the silver-haired woman. "Has your son ever had any near-death experiences?"

She stared at the blue-haired woman for a good ten seconds before looking away, her expression pained. "There was one… when he was five, he nearly drowned. We… we didn't notice at first, and when we found him, he wasn't breathing anymore. He was all blue and cold… a lifeguard saved him. He said he was already dead first, but he still tried and… and my son survived…"

Konan tried to give the woman an encouraging smile, but it was kind of hard for the blue-haired woman to display any emotions at all, let alone a smile. "The sun is starting to set, visiting hours are over. It'd be better if you go now – here, I'll go with you."

--

_Bogotá, Colombia, June 2__nd__ 2009, 13:15 o'clock_

"Good afternoon."

The brunette man nearly jumped in his swivel chair and glared at the door. A green-haired man was currently going through it – and by going through, I mean _going through without opening them_. "You could have knocked, Zetsu."

The green-haired man – Zetsu – walked towards the large wooden desk. "**Waste of time. **Now, be nice… **I am nice. **Shut up. Leader sent us."

The brunette sighed, running a hand through his chin-length messy hair. "What does Señor Leader want now?"

"You may be gaining a protégé soon. Leader wants you to look after him until he has prepared a place for training."

"Ugh. Why me? Sasori can have him as his protégé for all I care."

"**Sasori already has that obnoxious American brat.** Just accept your fate, Kakuzu. Leader's orders are ultimate."

The brunette rolled his bright green eyes. "Whatever. Leave me alone now, I still have business to take care of. And use the door next time!"

--

Konan didn't notice that she forgot her notebook until she had watched Mrs Leonie Vogel drive away.

The setting sun tinted the entire room scarlet, making Konan shiver uncomfortably. She quickly retrieved her notebook, which she had forgotten on the bedside table. She felt the last warm sunrays die on her back and took a deep breath, standing there for a good moment.

"Are you… an angel…?"

Her eyes darted down onto the bed, widening when they were met by purple ones, looking unclear and feverish.

The boy was awake.

Her heart beat rapidly in her chest from panic, but she tried to keep her expression stony. Her hands betrayed her composure, shaking as she gripped her notebook tighter. She swallowed quietly. "Yes."

"I see…" The boy's voice was scratchy and choked from not using it for a long time. His body was deathly still with the exception of his lips, which were trembling slightly. "Am I going to die…?"

She hesitantly laid her pale hand on his even paler forehead and closed her eyes. "No."

He lost his conscious again with a sigh.

--

_Tokyo, Japan, June 3__rd __2009, 00:31 o'clock_

In a small dark room sat a single figure, hunched over a videogame controller, face barely illuminated by the TV. The figure made no noise; the only sounds in the room came from the game and the controller, clicking with the quick movements of the teenager's fingers. One dark eye was focused on the screen, the other was covered by an eyepatch. He briefly blew at the black hair sticking into his eye from underneath his beanie hat.

Suddenly, in between empty chips bags and coca cola bottles, something started vibrating, shortly followed by a high-pitched melody.

The game was paused and the teenager felt around the floor for his cellphone, eventually finding it and pressing it to his ear. "_Moshi moshi_? Ah, Leader-sama… A mission with Kisame-senpai? Of course Tobi will do it." He smiled in an eerie way. "After all, Tobi is a good boy."

--

Small pronunciation lesson:  
Vogel – pronounced Fo-gull; German for "bird", quite a common last name  
Bärtschi – bear-tshee; Swiss last name  
I tried to make the time differences between the different countries accurate, sorry if I got something wrong x_x Anyway, I hope you liked it and please let me know what you thought!


	3. 02

**You can sit beside me when the world comes down**

-- Chapter 02: „Well you eat snails!" --

_Bern, Switzerland; June 4th 2009, 14:35 o'clock_

Pale fingers ran over the scrolling wheel of the mouse attached to the computers in a bored way, fitting perfectly with the equally bored expression of the matching face. Dark eyes regarded the computer screen idly.

Today's teenage generation was just so stupid. Here he sat, a Japanese teen in Switzerland, and used google translator to read comments on a German myspace page. Really, had those kids ever heard of online predators? He couldn't hold back a smirk. It would be so easy to hack into this account, too; he didn't need to, but just knowing that he could made him feel smug.

He clicked through a few pictures, all the while smirking. That kid and a girl snuggled up together in winter clothes, picture taken at a "myspace angle". Kissing. How pathetically cute. There were more; some of that kid playing football (he rolled his eyes at this. It was so stereotypical for a German kid to play football), more of him and that girl kissing, so she might have been his girlfriend, and a couple silly pictures with other guys.

Getting bored of pictures, he decided to translate some of the comments.

_Hey sweet, please me if you, finally, from the hospital comes, dare totally__ : (loves you3_

He snorted. That translation made no sense. Fucking online translators. He decided to try a few more, but they all came out in gibberish, so he went back to look at the tagged photos.

Olalla, a photo of that kid kissing another boy, appearing piss drunk.

"Why, Itachi, you didn't tell me you're looking for a boyfriend online. I'm disappointed; here I am your protector and you don't confide in me…"

Itachi turned his head, glaring. "Aren't you being funny… I thought you were on a mission in Canada, Kisame."

"Just joshin'. G'Day to you too, Itachi, why so narky?" Kisame pulled up a chair, sitting next to Itachi. He grinned at the much shorter teen. "Sir Leader called me back for a mission in Germany with Tobi. I'm really jetlagged, but I have to leave soon again."

"Hm." Itachi closed the browser, fully turning his attention to the tall man. "It's strange that he would send you on a mission with Tobi. After all, Tobi is Zetsu's protégé."

"Tobi and Zetsu make a good spying combo, but for the recruitment of members, he'll need someone with more physical strength." Kisame grinned. "It's going to be awkward if that kid doesn't speak English, though." He got back up, stretching. "Ah, I'll be taking my leave to see Sir Leader before he chucks a spazz. Don't stay in front of the screen too long, chap, it'll give you square eyes."

Itachi stared after the tall man. "I have no idea what he just said."

--

"What do you have to report?"

Konan neatly folded her hands in her lap. "As you suspected, Hidan seems to have a special ability. He heals incredibly fast; according to his mother, he once broke his arm and it took only two days to heal after the bone was set. It also appears that he can't die."

"What about his background?"

"He lives with his mother and two younger siblings. None of them appear to have a special ability, though, he is the only one showing signs."

"Any signs of _them_?"

Konan shook her head softly. "None yet, but it is only a matter of time."

"Good. I have sent Kisame to accompany Tobi, if anything happens. They left for Germany this morning."

Konan's eyes narrowed slightly. "I just reported. What would you have done if I had told you he didn't show any signs?"

"Killed him."

Konan took a harsh breath, getting up. "I'm leaving, I'm tired."

"Konan."

"…Yes?"

"I want you to check up on them in Bogotá on a regular basis. Once or twice a week, perhaps. The rest of the time, help out in London. That is, if he chooses Akatsuki over death."

Konan frowned. "Sir, the flight from London to Bogotá takes a whole day."

"Whoever said working for Akatsuki is easy?"

--

_Köln, Germany; June 4__th__ 2009, 23:28 o'clock_

When Hidan awoke with a clear head for the first time in a long time, he had a knife at his throat and a strange Asian teenager leaning over him.

"Hi," the Asian teenager said, smiling with his one visible eye closed, "let's be good friends."

Drip or not, Hidan punched him square in the face.

"Heh, feisty." A large figure which had previously been leaning against the wall walked towards the bed, putting a big hand on the Asian boy's back. "Poor Tobi, he just wants to be friends."

Hidan glared at the pair, his arms trembling from having moved them so suddenly after such a long time of rest. "Wer zur Hölle seid ihr und was wollt ihr von mir? Verpisst euch! Ich ruf die Bullen!" [Who the hell are you and what do you want from me? Fuck off! I'll call the cops!]

Kisame and Tobi looked at each other and sighed. Just great; the kid didn't speak English, and they didn't speak German. Why hadn't Leader sent Konan? She was the language genius! But no, of course it had to be Kisame and Tobi. Now this would just get so troublesome.

Kisame smirked. "I should just beat him up, then he'll come with us willingly and Konan can talk him into it."

Tobi frowned. "But Kisame-san, I don't think Leader-sama would approve of that."

The tall man sighed. "Fine, fine." He pointed at himself, looking at the boy on the bed. "Kisame Hoshigaki-Jones." He pointed at Tobi. "Tobi." He nodded towards the boy. "Name?"

The kid gave him the finger.

Kisame smiled. "That's a nice finger you have there. My, I just want to keep for myself… maybe I should chop it off."

"Kisame-san!"

"I know, I know." Kisame smirked, placing his hand on Hidan's arm. "But even if I can't use brute force… I can still use my other ability."

"Nimm deine dreckigen Finger von mir, du Arschloch!" ["Get your filthy hands off me, asshole!"] Hidan gasped, his body going into a spasm suddenly, he felt his energy leave his body, and before he knew what was going on, everything was going dark again.

--

_Paris, France; June 5__th__ 2009; 07:13 o'clock_

"Deidara!"

The blond grumbled, burying his head deeper into the pillow. "Five more minutes…"

"Deidara, wake up! _Allez_!"

The American sighed, rolling over onto his back and scratching his stomach where his shirt had ridden up while he slept. "I want pancakes for breakfast… Pancakes and muffins and poptarts…"

"_Zut alors!"_

Deidara jerked awake when his body started moving clumsily without his consent, making him sit up. He scowled at the redhead standing in the doorframe. "Damnit, Sasori, why are you waking me up? It's way too early!"

Sasori rolled his eyes. "Monsieur Leader wants us to come to Bern. Our train leaves in an 'our. 'Urry up, I'm not waiting for you any longer."

--

_Bern, Switzerland__; June 5__th__ 2009; 16:21 o'clock_

Itachi sat down in front of his laptop, going back to what he had been doing before deciding to grab a snack – namely checking out the youtube account of that kid's girlfriend.

And bingo. There were videos of the kid. He clicked the first video he saw, which just happened to be a close up of both their faces, appearing like the girl was holding the camera… upside down.

"_Jetzt komm, Hidan, lächle' doch mal…" _

„_Ey das ist doch einfach nur peinlich…" _

„_Gar nicht, jetzt mach…" _

„_Nimm diese Scheiß Kamera aus meinem Gesicht!" _

„_Chill mal… Gut, wenn du nicht lachen willst, dann küss mich." _

„_Wenn du dann endlich die bescheuerte Kamera weg tust…"_

„…"

„…"

„_Ach Mist, das war ja die ganze Zeit auf Video geschaltet!"_

Itachi snorted. What an angry kid; he hadn't even understood the dialogue, but that whiny voice and aggressive way of speaking already got on his nerves. He quickly typed the video info into an online translator, receiving a translation he could actually understand:_ My treasure and I 3 failed attempts a photo to do:). _

"What a cute girl!"

Itachi didn't even bother to look up; he just closed the browser. "What do you want, Tobi?"

Tobi beamed. "Who was that girl? Tobi thinks she looks very pretty. And the boy was Hidan-san, right?"

Itachi turned to glare at him. "That's none of your business. What are you doing here? I thought you were on a mission with Kisame."

"Oh, I was." The Japanese teen grinned. "Kisame-san should be arriving shortly with our new member."

Itachi raised an eyebrow. "You… persuaded him to join? Just like that?"

"Of course not." Tobi snorted. "Don't be silly, Itachi-san. Kisame drained his energy until he passed out."

The long-haired teen sighed. "Why does this not come as a surprise for me?"

--

"It has been a while, Señorita Konan."

Konan looked up from the files she had been working on, a small smile appearing on her lips. "It has, but you still look the same, Kakuzu. You haven't aged at all."

Kakuzu smirked slightly, closing the door to Konan's office behind him. "Can't say the same for you; you have grown into a woman."

She rolled her eyes. "You're acting as if I was a child the last time you saw me."

"You were."

"I was eighteen."

"Like I said – a child."

She sighed. "Stubborn old man. Aren't you jetlagged? You must have just arrived."

"I just arrived and you already want to get rid of me?"

Konan pinched the bridge of her nose, feeling a headache coming. "Kakuzu, I'm happy to see you and I feel honored that the first thing you do is come to my office, but I have work to do. Go eat something, rest, and I will finish up."

"Where's the kid who is supposed to become my protégé?"

Konan actually glared at him. Usually, she was a very patient woman, and he wasn't one to press. "Kisame only just brought him. Leader and some of our medical staff are currently with him to evaluate his condition. Now shoo!"

--

"Zetsu-san, you're here!"

The green-haired man stared down awkwardly at the Japanese teenage who was hugging him tightly. Whatever happened to the Asian composure? "Tobi, let go…"

"This is the way Germans greet each other!" Tobi let go, grinning up at his mentor. "Tobi saw it when he was in Germany! They hug each other for a greeting and shake hands!"

"…Tobi, is your nose _blue_?"

"The new recruit socked him in the face."

Tobi frowned at the newcomer. "Kisame-san, you weren't supposed to say that!"

Kisame smirked. "Sorry, kid. Hi Zetsu, long time no see. Actually, it has been a while since everyone was gathered in one place…"

"It's not every day that Akatsuki gets a new member." Zetsu commented calmly.

Kisame made a face. "I don't like that chap. He doesn't even speak English, he doesn't understand me."

"Nobody understands you, yeah." Deidara walked up to the trio, rolling his eyes. "You don't even speak English."

Sasori scowled at his partner. "Says the person who spells 'colour' without the 'u'."

Deidara gave the Frenchman an annoyed look. "Says the person who… who… well, you eat snails!"

"Deidara is right. **Kisame's English is hard to understand.** But it does not matter. **Yes, it does. **Shut up. _**You**_** shut up. **Just be quiet, you're scaring Tobi. **Who gives a damn? **I do!"

"Anou…" Tobi blinked, taking a cautious step back. "Tobi needs to… go to the bathroom. Hai. Em… bai!"

Itachi sighed from his spot leaning against the wall, thankful that no-one had noticed him. Now he remembered why he liked that Akatsuki operated from different countries…

Nutcases. All of them.

-- /Chapter 02 --

Next chapter title: "**Akatsuki**".

Feedback is appreciated. Hope everyone had a good start into the new year – better than mine, at least.


	4. 03

**You can sit beside me when the world comes down**

-- Chapter 03: „Akatsuki" --

"Pain!" Konan burst into the main office, completely out of breath. Her usual composure was forgotten, making room for an almost panicking expression. "The boy woke up and he's trashing the room! He has smashed medical equipment and knocked three doctors unconscious before the rest managed to lock him in his room!"

Pain – a man with messy orange hair, grey eyes and piercings in the bridge of his nose, ears and lips - raised an eyebrow. "Send Sasori, Deidara, Tobi, Zetsu and Kisame out. I want them gone from the mansion for the rest of the day. Call Itachi and Kakuzu; I want you and them in front of the boy's room in half an hour. By that time, have the building cleared."

Konan swallowed before nodding quickly. "I will be waiting for you."

--

"It's nice to get a break, isn't it, Zetsu?" Kisame smiled at this colleague, who looked anything but pleased.

"I guess…"

Sasori sighed, looking at his watch. "Where are Deidara and Tobi? We were supposed to have left the building ten minutes ago."

"Tobi is here!"

Sasori looked up – and immediately wished he hadn't.

Tobi was packed with a huge camera, a camera bag and a backpack with the belts pulled tight so it sat high on his back. "Can we go sightseeing in Bern now?!"

Even worse than Tobi was Deidara, who was wearing a horrid Hawaii shirt, three-quarter pants and porn glasses. He, too, had a big camera hanging around his neck. "Let's go, yeah!"

Sasori stared at them, absolutely traumatized by the proof of the cliché that the Asians and Americans were horrible, horrible tourists. It took him a good twenty seconds before he regained his composure. "Go change. _Maintenant_!"

--

"Sir Leader?" Konan knocked on the office door before entering, feeling absolutely uncomfortable. She looked around in the dark room, biting her lip. "You haven't confirmed the boy's identity yet."

"Regard it as confirmed." Konan didn't need to see her leader to know he was probably smirking. "It has been a long time and he has changed a lot, but I guess that's what twenty years of torture do to a person…"

"What are we supposed to do if he refuses to join our cause?"

"Oh, he will."

"And if not?"

"Give him to Sasori as a human experiment. I'm sure he'll appreciate a guinea pig who can't die."

She bowed her head quickly. "As you wish."

--

Hidan glared at the door of the pristine white room – or what was left of it, anyway.

When he had woken up and there were doctors all around him, he had just lost it, especially upon realizing that _none_ of them spoke German. They had shouted things, tried to keep him from getting out of that stupid bed, and – and where the hell _was_ he anyway, how did he get there, and – and then they suddenly had _syringes_ in their hands and were aiming them threateningly at him, so Hidan grabbed a vase and chucked it at one, knocked out two more guys, and – what the _fuck _was going on?!

His eyes were still focused on the door, fingers wrapped tightly around a scalpel he had found on the bedside table, and he growled, daring anyone to come in side.

And then the door opened just a bit and – the next thing Hidan knew, he was tied to the bed.

What the…

"_Good job, Itachi_," an orange-haired man with many piercings in his face said, and when the hell had he entered? His English sounded weird, so arrogant.

There were more people in the room; an Asian boy with a black ponytail, glasses and red eyes, a tan man in a business suit with brown hair and a stern look on his face, and then a blue-haired woman in secretary type clothes who looked awfully familiar…

And all their attention was on him. Not good.

"Where the fuck am I?! Untie me, you bastards!" He struggled against the rope binding him.

"Calm down," the woman said, stepping closer, and Hidan was relieved to realize that she spoke German, even though it was in a Swiss dialect. "Your name is Hidan, right?"

Hidan nodded hesitantly, glancing at her suspiciously. "Who are you and what the fuck do you want from me? I don't have any fucking money."

She stayed quiet for a moment, shooting a look at the orange-haired man, before sitting on the edge of Hidan's bed. "My name is Konan Acklin, and we are all members of an organization called Akatsuki. You, Hidan, have an amazing gift, and that's why we want you to join our cause."

The silver-haired boy narrowed his eyes. "A gift?"

"Don't tell me you haven't noticed." She tilted her head slightly, her unnerving emotionless gaze boring holes into his eyes. "How you never got sick, healed incredibly fast – survived that trainwreck…"

Hidan's purple eyes narrowed even further. "Was that you behind the explosions on the…" He paused. "That fucking American! It was him, wasn't it?! I'm going to kill you all! Do you know how much pain you fucking put me through?!"

"You shouldn't be upset." She placed her hand on his arm. Her touch felt cold, sending chills down Hidan's spine and making him wonder if there was anything warm, anything human about her at all. "Because of that incident, we discovered your ability. You're immortal, Hidan."

He snorted. "That doesn't even fucking exist, bitch."

"I can prove it to you." She ran her finger down his arm. "Just by cutting here, I could kill a human. You'd survive it. Want to try?"

Hidan growled at her. "Stop fucking touching me! Look, lady, I just want to fucking go home!"

She stayed quiet for a moment. "Hidan, I don't think you realize this, but we are trying to help you. We will help you gain control over your gift, train your gift, and protect you from those who oppose the gifts of God."

"God!" He spat the word out as if it burned his tongue. "In the eyes of God, people with gifts or whatever the fuck you call them would be demons!"

"You're wrong. God gave us these powers for a reason." Her face looked almost sympathetic. Almost. "He wanted us to have these powers, so we have to protect ourselves and each other. We must ensure our survival; that is what God wants."

"So that's the only fucking purpose of your stupid organization?" Hidan sneered. "To make sure none of you die?"

"It's not only that. The goals of Akatsuki are deeper." She finally removed her hand from his arm. "Our goal is to destroy a certain organization called Konoha. They are a major threat to our lives and have some people with gifts that can kill us. You are the exception, since you're an immortal." She folded her hands in her lap. "Listen, if you refuse to join our cause, our leader will do some horrible things to you. He won't let anyone stand in his way, and since you know all these things now, you cannot back out."

"Konan," the tan man interrupted, "_your negotiations don't seem very successful. What does he want?_"

"_He wants to go home_."

The brunette's green eyes narrowed in anger. "_Home_?" He turned his head towards Hidan, approaching in a menacingly slow way. _"Home? Where is that, brat? You're so naïve, thinking you can just go home… by now, the whole world has heard of your magical survival, and all the secret organizations have their attention on you. Home, you say? You want to go home?" _He barked a laugh_. "Listen, if they haven't already killed your family in order to find you, they will do so pretty soon. Go back there and your family has a chance of survival close to zero."_

Hidan had not understood a thing that guy had said, but he did make him feel nervous; his presence was dominating, taking over the whole room in a frightening way. "What the fuck does that guy want from me?!"

Konan's lips were a tight white line for a few moments before she forced herself to relax. "Those secret organizations like Konoha I mentioned earlier are already after you. They might have already harmed your family to get information on you; and trust me, Kakuzu would know that they don't hesitate in using these kinds of methods. Do you love your family?"

Hidan glared intensely at Konan, his mind working at a million miles an hour. He thought about his little brother; he had been a mere two years when their father had left, and Hidan had been ten. He thought about his younger sister, an ever-cheerful blonde who was often the only one to actually make Hidan smile.

He thought about his mother, a single mother who worked hard for her children, and he remembered how much they had fought when Hidan wanted to drop out of school and get a job so he could help her.

"If you love them, Hidan… fake your own death and join Akatsuki."

--

"_Sugoi_!" [Amazing!] Tobi grinned, taking another photo of the _Zytglogge_. "This town is so pretty!"

"We got that during the first sree 'ours of our trip." Sasori sighed. "I am 'ungry and tired."

"Aw, come on, Sasori!" Deidara grinned, sitting on a bench next to the redhead. "It's been fun, hasn't it?"

Sasori glared. "It would 'ave been fun if you 'ad just let me enjoy the beautiful architecture in peace, but you and Tobi were so loud that I was embarrassed to even stand near you, obnoxious American brat."

Dei snorted, getting out his camera once again. "You're just an old boring man – what's the fun in just walking around and looking? You gotta take photos, yeah!"

Meanwhile, Tobi was busy posing with a traditionally dressed Swiss woman in a dirndl, flashing a peace sign. "Oh, guys, guys! Can we go to Einstein's apartment next?!"

Sasori stared at the Japanese teen in disbelief. "You treat this peace of art like an adventure park! Like Disney land!"

Kisame patted the redhead's shoulder sympathetically. "Cheer up, chap! At least we don't have to be in the same building as that grumpy chap we brought from Germany. I feel sorry for Kakuzu and the others…"

"Hey, Master!" Deidara grinned at the Frenchman. "Did you know Paul Klee was from around here?"

Sasori sneered. "Shows what you know about art, brat. Paul Klee cannot be considered an artist, he –"

"He taught at Bauhaus, yeah!" Deidara glared. "How can you insult Paul Klee, hm? Him and Kandinsky –"

"Are not artists!" Sasori got up, crossing his arms over his chest. "Claude Monet was an artist!"

Zetsu sighed. "These two are worse than we are. **So right, my friend." **

--

"Fake my…" Hidan gritted his teeth, glaring at Konan. "Do you even listen to yourself?! How can I – I can't just let my family down, bitch!"

"You will only endanger them if you don't."

Hidan bit his lip, looking away. "How the fuck should I even fake my death? I bet police everywhere are looking for me!"

She smiled, and it looked seriously creepy. "Don't worry about the police. Officially, the great survivor of the Brühl trainwreck finally died from the after-effects of his injuries."

Hidan's head snapped up to look at her, anger evident on his face. "You fucking bitch! You've already faked my death?! I'm going to kill you! Shit!"

Oddly enough, it was the tan guy who stirred at Hidan's outburst. _"Konan, tell him that it's the best for his family that he leaves."_

"_I already did, he won't listen." _

"_Let me."_ The Asian teenager stepped forward, and when Hidan looked up, his red eyes began spinning. And all Hidan did was blink and suddenly, the room was entirely black; everyone was gone with the exception of himself and the Asian teenager.

Hidan furrowed his eyebrows, looking at the other teen in confusion, when he noticed something on the floor.

Bodies…?

He gasped when he realized who it was and suddenly the ropes tying him to the bed were gone, allowing him to fall forward. There were four bodies; he quickly turned the first around – a blond girl in her early teens, her formerly cute face lifeless. "Hannah!" His shaking hands could not hold her much longer, dropping her onto the slightly bigger and more mature form of his girlfriend. "Alina!" He did not dare to touch the other bodies – his mother and brother.

His entire form was shaking when he turned towards the Asian teenager – he began yelling before he even realized that the room had gone back to normal and he was still tied to the bed, eyes stinging with tears that he did not dare to shed. "You fucking bastard, what did you do to them?! I'm going to fucking kill you!"

Konan regarded him with an apathetic look. "If you join Akatsuki, they will be protected. They'll think you're dead, but that's better than losing them, isn't it?"

"Are you fucking stupid?!" Hidan looked away. "I'll lose them either way."

"But at least you will all be alive that way, isn't that worth anything to you?"

Hidan remained quiet for a few moments, trying to make sense of everything that had been said in the past few hours. "If we destroy those organizations who threaten you, will I be able to go back to my family?"

Konan looked mildly surprised before sending an uncertain look to the orange-haired man. "The possibility exists."

The silver-haired teen closed his eyes for a moment before nodding, directing his gaze at Konan with new determination. "I'll join your organization, but fucking note that I'm not doing it to serve your purposes. I am doing this for myself, seriously."

Konan turned towards the orange-haired man and nodded. "_He'll join."_

"_Good_." He nodded. _"The most important thing for now is that he learns English so he can communicate with our other members._"

Hidan glared at him. "_I… speaks a little English…"_

Pain actually looked a little amused at this. _"Either way, you will stay here for a few more days so you can meet your future mates and we can organize a fake ID and other things like that for you. You'll need some clothes, too." _

Okay, so the only word Hidan had understood was 'clothes', but that was enough to make him realize he was still wearing that stupid-ass hospital gown. "Uh… _yes_…?"

Konan motioned towards the orange-haired man. "This is Pain Williams. You will receive all your orders directly from him, or me as his secretary." She pointed at the brunette. "That is your future mentor, Kakuzu Suarez Espinosa Lopez García –"

"What the _fuck_? Who the hell actually calls their kid that?!"

"It's all last names. Latinos." Konan shrugged. "And the boy over there is Itachi Uchiha."

--

"Today was so much fun, yeah!"

Sasori sighed in exasperation when he finally walked into the mansion the Akatsuki had rented as a temporary hideout. "_Enfin_…" [Finally…]

"I'm so hungry, yeah!" Deidara walked ahead of Sasori, not even noticing that the Frenchman wasn't listening. "I told you we should have eaten at McDonald's when we had the chance, that's at least something I recognize!"

Sasori snorted. "I refuse to eat that… that thing they sell at McDonald! I will cook something for everyone if you let me rest for an 'our."

"As long as it's not snails again…"

Sasori glowered at the blond. "Snails are a delicacy in France, you obnoxious American brat!"

"Aahh, _du_!" [You!]

Both men looked up in confusion when someone yelled, and lo and behold, at the end of the hall stood a teen Deidara recognized all too well. He grinned awkwardly. "Oh, hey! What's up, buddy, how you –"

The silver-haired teen did not let the American finish. He greeted him with a punch.

"Ow, fuck! I think he broke my nose! Sasori, my nose is bleeding, help me!"

Sasori smirked. "You deserved that."

The silver-haired boy cracked his fist, glaring at Deidara. "_Den war ich dir noch schuldig, du Wichser."_ ["I owed you that one, jerk!"]

Itachi smirked, walking up behind the German. He raised his eyebrows, looking at Deidara. "I see, you've met the newbie. His name is Hidan and he'll be Kakuzu-san's protégé."

Deidara glared, pinching his nose to stop the blood from running down his face. "Stop smirking, Uchiha!"

Itachi's smirk only broadened and he put his hand on Hidan's shoulder. "The Germans called it _Schadenfreude_."


	5. 04

A/N: Um. I can't speak Swiss German. So when Konan speaks German in the fic? It's a horribly butchered, stereotypical attempt at Swiss German. Should any Swiss people read this, I beg you not to be offended by my infinite amounts of fail.

Also, before you go yelling at me about how weak Hidan is in this chapter, keep in mind that he isn't a ninja and has never been trained to fight.

To Entangled – Schadenfreude is a Germanism which is used in the English language as well. Roughly, it means "to be happy about someone else's misfortune", or "malicious joy".

**You can sit beside me when the world comes down**

_– Bern, Switzerland, 12 June 2009, 14:59 o'clock --_

Hidan frowned at his mirror image, fingering his hair. God damn it, those bastards sure had fucked with it at the hospital – usually he kept it long enough to gel back and fall into his neck, but now he had uneven, messy strands of silver falling to his ears at the longest.

Bastards. Did they have a clue how long it took Hidan to find the one guy who was good at cutting his hair to his satisfaction?

He muttered some curse words in German as he splashed some water onto his hair to try to slick it back somehow. Today, Konan had said, she would take him shopping to get him some clothes and other things he'd need and the German seriously dreaded it – he felt the need to punch her in the face every time she spoke with her annoying Swiss dialect. Just out of spite, he made sure to use his local dialect instead of speaking "proper" German whenever he was with the blue-haired female.

Itachi was the one who lent him clothes since they were about the same height and weight, and it wasn't that Hidan wasn't grateful, but Itachi's style of clothes fucking sucked. Did he have anything other than plain pants and shirts? Hidan much preferred his old baggy jeans, stylish shirts and big hoodies.

Somebody knocked on the door to the bathroom and Hidan innerly groaned. "_Was_?" [What?]

"_Das Mittagessen ist fertig."_ [Lunch is ready.]

"_Was gibt's denn?"_ [What are we having?]

"_Irgendwas mit Rüebli und Nüsslisalat."_ [Something with carrots and field salad.]

"_Was?"_ [What?]

"_Rüebli und –"_ [Carrots and - ]

"_Das hab ich schon verstanden."_ The silver-haired boy unlocked the door and opened it, glaring at Konan, who stared at him coolly_. "Kannste nich ma hochdeutsch sprechen ey? Das heißt Karotten und Feldsalat!"_ [I understood that much. Can't ya speak normal German? It's called carrots and field salad!]

The blue-haired woman snorted. "_Pass dich an."_ [Adapt.] And with that, she was gone.

–

Tobi sighed wistfully, pouting. "It's going to be so boring here without you, Deidara-senpai."

The blond sent him an annoyed look, packing the last of his clothes into a big army rucksack. "Stop being such a drama queen, hmm. I'm only going on a mission with Sasori."

"But the others are so boring!"

Deidara huffed, closing the bag. "This isn't supposed to be fun, yeah! We're a terrorist organisation, Tobi, not Disneyland!"

The Japanese teen blinked. "But Deidara-senpai, you always have fun on your missions."

"…Get your ass out of here before I blow you up, yeah."

--

As much as Hidan disliked Konan, he had to admit that she had good taste. Or at least that's what he thought when she presented him with a suitcase full of clothes – brand clothes at that!

Having grown up in a not-so-wealthy family, this was probably the first time Hidan held Diesel jeans and a Rolex watch in his hands, and damn did it feel awesome.

"The suitcase also contains your new passport, different IDs you can use if you need one, a driver's license -"

"Uh, I never learned to drive. It's fucking expensive in Germany."

"We'll teach you when we've reached London."

"What the fuck? But they drive on the wrong side of the road!"

"You will learn both ways." She brushed a stray strand of hair out of her eyes. "Anyway – two cellphones, money in various currencies - "

Hidan fished a brand new brown leather wallet out of the suitcase and opened it, pulling out different kinds of cards. "There's a misprint. My last name isn't Bösherz; it's Vogel."

Konan rolled her amber eyes. "It's not a misprint. From now on, your name is Hidan Bösherz. We can't let you run around with the name of a dead boy, can we?"

--

"Everyone is gathered? Very well." Pain let his gaze wander around the room, studying each of the organisation members briefly. "Deidara and Sasori are going on a mission in Russia. We have finally found out who the head of a Russian governmental organisation targeting us is. His name is Gaara Ivanov. I do not accept failure."

"Yes, Sir."

"Zetsu, Tobi. I need you to do some research in Johannesburg. Konan will brief you in a few days."

"Yes, Sir!"

"Kakuzu, go back to Bogotá. There's a deal I don't want you to miss."

"Yes, Sir."

"Kisame, Itachi, you are without a mission for now. Use your free time efficiently."

"Yes, Sir."

"And Hidan, you are coming with me."

Hidan frowned at Pain, confused. "Okay."

--

Hidan had never been on a plane before; scratch that, he hadn't even been at an airport before.

He wasn't scared of flying though – not now that he knew he was immortal. He couldn't care less about what happened to him anymore – he'd survive it all, and if he was patient enough , he'd be able to get out of any dilemma.

Even out of this organisation.

He stared out of the window as the plane took off, sitting next to Konan. That Pain guy wasn't with them; Hidan didn't really care. It wasn't as if he understood him anyway.

A flight attendant came to offer them food and drinks, which Konan politely refused. Hidan watched her long legs and nicely shaped bottom when she walked on, earning him a glare from Konan.

"Stop staring. It's impolite."

Hidan rolled his eyes. "Chill. I was just looking."

"I thought you had a girlfriend back home."

Hidan snorted. "That bitch? I was going to break up with her before the accident."

Accident. Hidan mentally rolled his eyes; what a weird thing to call a terrorist attack.

Konan glanced at him out of the corner of her eye. "Your mother said she was quite sweet."

"Cheaters aren't sweet. Especially when they can't tell you the truth." Regarding the conversation as over, Hidan fished out his mp3 player from the pocket of his pants and put the earphones in his ears, turning up the volume.

--

_London, England, 14 June 2009, 15:08 o'clock_

When they landed in London, it was raining. After they got their luggage and got picked up by a very nice looking black BMW, it was still raining. The whole drive long, Hidan heard the drizzle of the rain against the car roof and watched the raindrops run down the window.

"Fuck," he muttered, glaring at the scenery passing his window. They had long left the city behind; houses were becoming a rarer and rarer sight. He hated the countryside with a passion; he was an urban kid through and through. He loved the traffic, the noise, the people, the hecticness.

Konan had been busy with a laptop, typing away as if it was all she did, her long fingernails clacking on the keys. It annoyed the shit out of Hidan.

"I'm thirty," he announced in a pointedly whiny voice. "Are we there yet?"

She completely ignored him.

Fuck this. Let brand clothes be brand clothes, everyone in this organisation acted like a fucking prick. He was just about to ask again when the car suddenly came to a halt.

"_We have arrived, Miss Acklin._"

Hidan immediately got out of the car, not minding the rain too much at that moment, and found himself standing in the courtyard of a medium-sized mansion. He half-expected lightening to illuminate it for a split second, because really, it did look like one of those mansions from horror movies.

As it was, though, there was no lightning or thunder. Just that fucking rain pouring from the sky as if the apocalypse was coming. Men in suits – butlers? – came up to them, holding umbrellas over them and getting their luggage.

"_Welcome to Rain Mansion_, " said a small woman with orange hair that she wore in a bun on top of her head. Her eyes had eerie grey rings in them, reminding Hidan of that Pain guy from earlier. "_I will show you to your room, Mr Bösherz_."

--

"This will be your room for the next few months." Konan opened the door and switched the light on. It was only dim, Hidan quickly realized. Damn. "I am only a few doors down, but I won't be here at Rain Mansion much. You will be training with Pain and studying English for a while. When Pain thinks you're ready, you will be sent to Kakuzu."

"Whatever." Hidan glared at her. "As long as I don't have to hear your annoying way of talking anymore."

She ignored his comment completely, as always. "Pain wants to see you after dinner. A butler will fetch you."

--

"Are you sure it's good for him to be here?" Konan took a sip of her tea. "Kakuzu might be better fit to train him, since they will be partners."

"Hidan is special." The orange-haired woman regarded Konan impassively. "I will be testing his threshold of pain and train him to bear immense pain. An immortal is of no use if his pain tolerance is the same as that of a normal person."

Konan nearly dropped her teacup. "Nagato, if you do that, you are going to completely break him. That is what we were trying to save him from."

"There is a difference. We are going to toughen him." The orange-haired woman's eyes narrowed slightly. "Konoha made him a will-less doll. When I am finished with him, he might not be normal anymore, but he will still have his own will."

"He killed his own conscious to escape reality. That is what we were told." Konan closed her eyes, not wanting to look at the other woman. "It is like for Itachi – he was dead, but now that he is alive, he suffers. Being dead might have been better."

"You dare to question my methods?"

"…No, of course not."

--

Hidan did not feel comfortable in his new room; the walls were of a pure white, the sheets on his queensize bed were white, his desk made of glass and metal and the carpet of a dark blue. There were two windows with white curtains and no blinds, but he guessed that the room would be pretty dark anyway considering the weather outside.

There was no form of entertainment; no gaming system, no TV, no computer, no stereo. Perhaps he should ask Pain at least for stereo so he could listen to music more loudly than through his ipod.

While there was no wardrobe, he found a walk-in closet with a rack and started unpacking, being careful not ruin the expensive clothes. He still couldn't believe it – all those brands he'd been wanting…

Eventually, a butler came to pick him up, led him to the dining room and announced what would be for dinner. The only other persons at the table were Konan and that orange-haired woman.

"Heh," Hidan smirked. "Knew the ladies can't resist me."

"Don't even go there," Konan mumbled, "it's necrophilia." Seeing Hidan's confused face, she sighed. "Nevermind."

The rest of dinner passed in silence; Hidan poked at the strange things on his plate in confusion, Konan ate quietly and that orange-haired woman stared blankly. Hidan felt more than a little creeped out by her. So he tried his best to remember some English and glared at her. "_Stop looking_."

She smirked at him, though it didn't reach her eyes. "_Scared_?"

He looked at Konan for translation help, but all she did was ignore him. Again. It was seriously getting annoying. And so, he raked his brain for some kind of comeback he could say in English. "_Your Mom_."

The smirk left her face. "_My mom is dead_."

"_What, your Mom is your Dad_?" Hidan frowned. "_That's fucked up_."

Now even Konan stared at him, her dull expression for once left her face, making room for confusion. "…I don't even want to know. But stop messing with Pain."

Hidan paused. "Wait, that's…? But Pain was a guy!"

"He is. And he's also that girl over there. You'll be meeting more Pains soon."

"Great," Hidan complained sarcastically, "just what I need, seriously."

"_Finish your food_," Pain commanded him, "_I want to start with the training_."

--

She took him to a room in the basement, and Hidan was seriously creeped out. The room, like his own, had painted-white walls, a dark carpet and glass furniture. Already awaiting him was a man with long orange hair and bangs framing his face, wearing a black cloak with red clouds on it.

"_You may call us Animal and Human_," he said instead of a greeting. Hidan glared. Those names were fucking stupid.

Konan was with them, too, but she stood off to the side, not looking a Hidan at all. "Pain is going to test your tolerance for pain and train you. I'm only here for a while to translate."

"Okay. What do I have to do?"

Konan closed her eyes. "Attack Pain. Give everything you have."

"Heh." Hidan smirked. "Don't underestimate me, I'm strong. I can beat the beau and the girl for sure." He turned around and – without any sort of warning at all, had the man's fist in his face. Stumbling back, he quickly touched his nose – it wasn't bleeding, thank fuck. "What the fuck, man?!"

"_Your opponent is not going to wait for you to be ready_," the man said, taking swing again. This time, Hidan reacted quickly by ducking and shoving his elbow into Human's stomach, making him fall back. But as soon as he had fended off Human, Animal came at him, kicking his legs away from underneath him and making him fall over.

He tried to get back up, but when he did, Human kept him down by putting his foot on Hidan's chest. "_I could break your ribs just like this_."

"_What a poor performance_," Animal added, her face expressionless. "_I expected more_. _Let's test your pain tolerance then. I hope I won't be disappointed."_

It was then that Konan left the room, and Hidan looked after her almost desperately. The two Pains, however, paid no mind to her and smirked down at him before Animal delivered him a swift kick in the ribs, making him gasp. Human applied more pressure by the second, and Hidan groaned, trying to breathe. "_Stop_!"

"_Stop? You're already in pain_?" Animal laughed tonelessly. "That's pathetic." She kicked again and Hidan cried out, hearing a sickening crack as the pain burst in his chest.

The Pains left him for a moment, allowing Hidan to clutch at where he was sure a rib was broken. He tried to get up, and though it took him a moment, he managed. He had barely a few seconds before Human grabbed him by his hair and slammed him face-first into the wall.

This time, his nose did start to bleed, and Hidan hated how it tasted on his lips. The pain was strong, but somewhat familiar – he had gotten into a lot of fights at home and actually broken his nose before, but that had always been against equal opponents. If he were to swallow his pride, he'd have to admit that he stood no chance against these two, who were obviously experienced fighters.

Fuck. The pain was actually making his eyes sting with tears.

Human turned him around, pressing him against the wall by his throat. He couldn't breathe, letting out choked noises and trying to pry Pain's hands from his throat. "_You're crying? How pathetic._"

Hidan spat in his face.

Pain didn't seem to care though; his fingers squeezed tighter around Hidan's throat, and Hidan was fairly sure that his trachea was about to be crushed – but then Human Pain all of a sudden threw him onto the ground, where he coughed and wheezed for a few moments.

There was something cold and rough pressing against his cheek, and when he looked up, he saw up a riding crop, then an arm wrapped in black material – belonging to a black cloak with red clouds, he knew. Animal Pain smirked at him. "_I'm going to teach you the true meaning of pain_."

--

Konan's hands were trembling slightly when she poured herself a cup of tea, then neatly setting a calmative pill beside it.

A scream rung through the air, making Konan cringe. She added another pill as an afterthought, popped both into her mouth and washed them down with tea.


End file.
